A few days ago, we had the honour of being the invited Foundation to the meetings of the Argentine association MIF, Mujeres Independientes y Federales. The pandemic has normalised these virtual meetings and technology allowed us to discuss current fundamental issues concerning the home.
From Home Renaissance Foundation we want to thank María Elena Critto and Carolina Castiglioni who have concentrated on making our work known and, above all, brought together such a select audience to talk about the importance of care and the role of women. Among the more than 70 women who attended this event were Carlota Pitiot, a union leader from Apoc, the former Argentine senator, Cristina Fiore, and the national member of Parliament Victoria Morales Gorleri. It was precisely the latter who shared her personal and enriching experience that I dare to summarize as follows:
We women love to talk about how things should be, know the numbers and educate our children in joint responsibility, but it is so hard for us to delegate that we do not always put that theory into practice.
She explained that, in the middle of the pandemic, teleworking and with all her 6 children at home, she was overwhelmed by the pressure of not being able to get everything done. At one point, she sat down with her family and asked for their help. It was her husband and her children who told her:
“Mum, you always talk to us about dividing the household tasks, sharing the responsibilities all together, feeling part of the home, but we are not putting it into practice. Of course, we want to help and we will do the housework together.”
From that day on, the load on her shoulders became lighter. She understood that indeed the time had come for that ideal to reach fruition.
But it is not necessary to be drowned in work before asking for help because we would be missing the point of co-responsibility. It does not consist of doing what the mother or organiser of the home does not attain but in dividing the work fairly among all the members of the home and experiencing first-hand what it means when a sole person does not take on all the responsibility of the home.
Because if there is one place you can fail, it’s in the home. It is at home where things can be corrected with affection, where you can be reminded of your responsibilities, where you learn to be part of something, to be important in your role. As Charles Handy explains in the HomeMakers Project, “At home, skills and abilities that are much needed for professional life are acquired.”
No one is indispensable but by working as a team you are a very necessary link for the rest of the project to go full steam ahead.